Aaaand we’re live!

It took a little while but I’ve finally put together a little writing Patreon where I can share updates on my novel! I never thought I’d take the time out to make one but I think it will be a way for me to keep track of my writing and hopefully get myself published!

Please clap. I need the approval

How does this work?

Taken From my Patreon Page:

About the Patreon
This Patreon will not be used to gain funds for publishing the book as it is a current work in progress. Instead the tiers are separated by how much you are invested in them. 

  • Updates will be bi-weekly and monthly and will include special additions to each tier.
  • As the novel nears closer to completion, higher reward tiers will be added for those who want extra bonuses.

About the Book
The current working title is “A Sign of Times and Seasons” and falls under the Urban Fantasy/Erotica tags. If you’re not into either of those genres this book will not be for you. The book will also contain topics like:

  • Supernatural Violence
  • Depression and Alcoholism
  • Sex (it is part erotica)
  • Navel-Gazing and Existential Pondering

Imani Cross has noticed that her quiet town has gotten a little bit quieter recently. People are moving away and not a lot has been going on since she divorced her husband out of boredom. Alone and cut off from those she cared about most she tries to navigate the suddenly-empty world. Now if only she could shake those whispers in her ear and those awful headaches!And then there’s that mushroom ring in the park…

Pricing of Tiers

Because this novel is a work in progress I will only be charging $1, $2, and $3 tiers. Each level will have little perks such as official character art and special Q&A with different characters. I’m trying not to make too many perks with this until I really get the ball rolling. I do plan on adding things such as merch, pins, and naming characters/places after patrons who reach a certain level. I may add a $5 tier towards the end when I get closer to finishing the novel proper and start an official crowdfunding campaign in order to get my work published and in your hands as a reward for your dedication.


I plan on updating bi-weekly/monthly. Since I’m just one writer things can get a little hectic when I get writer’s block. I want to be sure I give myself enough time to gather up all my rewards and have them published on time. As I become more comfortable with coming up with rewards and scheduling new things, the quality of the Patreon will go up and hopefully it will become more enjoyable for everyone.

Every once and a while I’ll end up not updating until the very end of the month. This will usually be from me working through a block or working extra hard to have plenty of content to drop at once.

What You Can Expect

Since the novel is supernatural in nature there will be lots of little things littered about. You can expect to see things like:

  • Official Character Art
  • Character Profiles
  • Q&A sessions for characters
  • Polls
  • Maps
  • Trivia

I can’t share all the details since I want to keep lots of things secret in the hopes you’ll be more interested in the novel itself. I will probably release all the chapters I have written so far on so that way everyone is able to read what has happened so far.

I do plan on being heavily involved with my Patreon and I’ll do my best to interact with every single one of you so that way this doesn’t come across as impersonal. I’m a real person here writing in real time. I’m not a bot, I promise!


This is Vengence (Is it Worth It?)

I think we have an obsession with revenge. We’ve got movies about it (I Spit on Your Grave, Kill Bill, John Wick), we’ve got songs about it (Better than Revenge- Taylor Swift, Gunpowder and Lead- Miranda Lambert, Fuck You- CeeLo Green), we’ve even got books about it (Count of Monte Cristo, just to name one). So when it comes to anime it’s no surprise that revenge is at least one character’s motivation. What happens when you make an entire series out of it?

Enter Enma Ai and Izuko (from Hellgirl and Skyhigh respectively) two female characters that know a thing or two about extracting vengeance with a relatively fair, but high cost. Let’s explore a dish that is best served cold—and no, I’m not talking about Phish Food from Ben & Jerry’s though you could be forgiven for thinking so.

My current Flavor of the Month

Hell Girl- Jigoku Shojo

The Hell Girl anime (manga and live action adaption) is about a girl named Ai who works for the Hell Correspondence (Jigoku Tsushin) who is in the business of dragging off souls to hell as vengeance that someone wished upon them. The process is as follows:

  • At midnight a website called Hell Correspondence appears to people who are searching for revenge.
  • The person types in the name of the person that they want sent to hell.
  • They are asked if that’s what they really want. If they say yes…
  • Ai appears to them and gives them a straw doll with a red cord. They are told that if they want to send that person to hell all they have to do is untie the red string. But they are warned that while the person in question will be sent to hell, they too will be sent to hell after they die, no exceptions.
Talk about driving a hard bargain. Sheesh!

Well, you know the formula and most likely how it all pans out. Person is being mistreated and feels there’s no way out, calls up Hell Girl who says “Yeah I’ll do it but these are the terms” and the person takes her up on her offer and pulls the string. The (usually bad person) ends up getting sent to hell in a trippy ironic sequence and the victim is left to ponder how they’ll enjoy the rest of their lives when they know they’ll just go to hell when they die. Ai lights a candle representing the remaining time they have left and puts it on her altar.

Your grievance has been avenged.

Skyhigh/Sky High

Izuko is a gatekeeper of sorts who meets people who have met an unfortunate end (suicide/murder/etc) and she gives them 3 choices:

  1. Ascend to heaven and be reincarnated in the next life.
  2. Wander the earth as a ghost forever.
  3. Extract revenge on whoever killed you and be sent to hell.

Oh, and did I mention you have 12 days to make your decision? She doesn’t interfere with the choices these souls make and remains mostly neutral and doesn’t interfere with the soul’s decision. Although she does tell one soul that her death couldn’t be helped and she might as well go to heaven and forget the pain.

The manga itself (written by Tsutomu Takahashi) is pretty straightforward and contemplative. You get to see the backstories of several souls and find out what killed them. You also get to see them contemplate their options and come to their final decision in confidence. It does a good job of showing people as…well…people. The author seems aware that the mind has difficulty grasping with the concepts of life and death as some souls have a hard time understanding that they have died.

The later manga have MUCH shorter chapters where you don’t really get to see what the soul decides to do. It becomes a tad bit jarring when you’re used to seeing fleshed out stories and then it suddenly cuts off at the climax. I’ll chalk it up to artistic storytelling. The suspense allows you to fill in the gaps with your own interpretation.

So, what about that dish?

What do I think about revenge? Is it overrated? Underrated? I’m kind of on the fence. Sometimes you have to really think about the nature of your revenge. In SkyHigh, the people who show up at the Gate of Grudges are already dead and have died from accidents or murders. In Hell Girl, the victims are still living and are forced to reckon with the possibility of actual eternal damnation. You can’t really compare these fairly, but it does make you think.

In my experience, getting revenge is hard. You have to either get it instantly the moment you’re humiliated or otherwise it becomes a long drawn out revenge saga with no catharsis in the end. The further you get from the event, the more the feelings build up with the hopes of a big payoff. And the chances of the payoff vary HEAVILY upon the experience in question.

I largely forgo revenge for a number of reasons. One of them being that I’m not John Wick and my life is not some epic revenge story.

And I don’t have these SICK reloading skills.

Another reason is that ACTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES. I don’t think that I have to really explain that statement. This isn’t to say that you can’t get justice by taking people to court or settling your accounts and cutting people out of your life. It’s honestly just easier to get therapy and move on with your life the best you can. Trauma is real. Pain is real. Life does some pretty nasty things to its participants. In the end, none of us finish our lives unscathed and we don’t measure the quality of it by our traumas and hurts.

When faced with the possibility of taking revenge, think about it over a pint of ice cream. By the time you finish it, you may find that the only dish best served cold is some Phish Food by Ben & Jerry’s.

Consider the Following:

Good evening everyone! Thank you for tuning in to Gigi NoRez blog where you don’t get a resurrection no matter how many kills you get across the map.While I’ve been in lockdown my gears have been turning and I’ve been coming up with dangerous ideas that include…starting a Patreon for my personal writing.

Wait, what?

Hear me out. I did a lot of writing pre-undergrad and I’ve participated in NaNoWriMo multiple times but I’ve never managed to finish a single manuscript. During the 2018 NNWM event I had a pretty good manuscript that I ended up not being able to finish but is still viable with a good story to be told.

Wake me up inside!


The Patreon will have $1, $2, and $3 tiers and will be updated bi-weekly to monthly. I don’t want to overcharge people for something that takes a long time to get invested in. While I’m confident the story will be engaging, I can’t promise to be entertaining 24/7. Later on I’ll add a $5 tier along with more benefits for when I get closer to finishing the novel proper.

This will also be an +18 Patreon that won’t be available to minors. I write adult fiction and even this blog is adult-oriented and not meant for young eyes. As such you’ll be able to expect the usual R-rated content:

  • Sex
  • Violence
  • Supernatural violence
  • Uncomfortable themes like divorce and alcoholism
  • Swearing

I originally intended for this to be supernatural erotica but there’s too much plot to go with the porn. And since I’m a descriptive broad I’ll file it under Urban Fantasy with smut thrown in here and there. Some smut will be relevant to the plot and others will just be me showcasing my love for sex scenes.

Now what?

I’ve technically had my Patreon launched but never had anything officially put on it. I still have some reconfiguring to do, adjusting my username/nomme de plume, my tiers and what you’ll get from each tier, and so on.

Until I make the actual official announcement, here are some of my other writings you can read in the meantime:

  • Eos: Mirror of Truth– A Final Fantasy 15 fanfiction that was meant to be an epic that had it’s own cosmology. Follows the main story and features: a long-lost goddess that needs prayers BADLY, an OC who shows up at a surprising pivotal time (it’s shameless isekai), and a surprising amount of sex/sexual tension. Rated M for Mature.
  • Neon Bloodsplatters and Teacups– A John Wick fanfiction where he meets someone from his past and makes peace with his future. Rated M for Mature
  • Son of the Witch– A Bayonetta, Persona 5, and Devil May Cry comedy where Bayonetta learns that she’s Joker’s long lost mother. Hilarity ensues. Rated OT(16+) for language and mentions of sex.
  • Give Me Dopamine- A RWBY fanfiction following Winter and Qrow as she learns the harsh realities of life and he tries to avoid his feelings. Rated M for Mature

Yes, I write a lot of fanfiction. Unfortunately I haven’t finished any of it. I hear that’s common with a lot of people. If you’d like to leave a review and/or make suggestions that would help the plot move along, I’d be happy to hear it. I promised myself that I wouldn’t start any more fanfiction until I finish the ones I currently have.

There’s no escaping it now.

In conclusion I’m starting a writing Patreon within a month and I’d be glad if any of you readers decided to follow it. I’ll even add a ko-fi link and Patreon button at the bottom of my blog posts from now on, just in case you change your mind later.

Become a Patron!

Rebooting in 5…

So, once again my absence has been noticed and I’m once again forced to explain myself. Took a little bit too much time off the top of the year and nowI have a 3 month deficit of content that I haven’t bothered making.


Your Honor, in my defense he was distracting me.

Well, the truth is a lot less interesting. You see, I’ve been in school—no really. I’ve been working on a bachelors degree and it took up all of my time. All of my creative energy was thrown 100% into my coursework and watching the same Blasphemous play through at least 11 times.

I became VERY familiar with this scene.

But now my classes are over and I have officially graduated—well we didn’t have a ceremony with caps and gowns but we got an email of congratulations from our college. Just take my word for it, it was very underwhelming.

So. Now I’m back with lowered expectations and the creeping feeling that my jokes about all anime being trash are actually a little bit more true than I thought. In my time away I have:

    Binged Avatar the Last Airbender
    Watched all 4 seasons of HunterXHunter on Netflix
    Finished up the final season of Bojack Horseman
    Started watching Yu-Yu Hakusho
    Finished up the latest season of RWBY
    Watched Atlantis: The Lost Empire and Treasure Planet back to back every day for a week.

That’s just what I can remember off of the top of my head.

Will I be expounding upon my feelings for each item in a separate blog post? Unlikely. Will I be scrounging around for scraps of exposition to toss in these posts? Also unlikely. Do I know where I’ll be going from here? I have a small idea. But thanks for hanging with me while I clear this system and start again.

Ecchi Review: Nozoki Ana

In my copious consumption of smut I sometimes find something I really, really, REALLY like. Among the tasteless escapades I sometimes uncover a gem or two or ten. Today’s carnal consumption is based on one of two fetishes that can get you a felony: voyeurism and exhibitionism. If you’re already a perverted person or kinky kind you’ll easily recognize these deviant behaviors (I say this with all fondness as a fellow deviant). 

Voyeurism can be described as: the practice of obtaining sexual gratification by looking at sexual objects or acts, especially secretively. Simply put: you get off on watching people without their knowledge.

Exhibitionism can be described as: a tendency to display one’s abilities or to behave in such a way as to attract attention. There’s also the psychiatric definition which describes it as a compulsion to expose yourself in public. 

This manga is kind enough to feature both for our viewing pleasure. It also has an anime, but we won’t focus on that today. Yes everyone, the voyeurist manga calls you–the reader–out on your voyeurism that you exhibit just by reading it. To prove the author right, you can read it here.

The Story

Written by Wakou Honna, this manga starts with our hapless every day college student Kido Tatsuhiko who discovers a hole in the wall of his apartment that shows the inside of the apartment next door. The next door neighbor happens to be none other than Emiru Ikuno, resident chronic masturbator and peeping Tom(ie)*. The short of it: Kido (inevitably) gets caught peeping and Emiru blackmails him into a perverted peeping game that lasts for…quite a while.

The start of darkness.

Screen Shot 2019-07-19 at 9.53.44 AM

Sexy shenanigans ensue…LOTS OF THEM. So much so that Kido-kun fucks his way through all but maybe 3 women of the named female cast. Classic ecchi strategy where we have no idea why everyone likes him so much but hey lets give him lots of pervy connections! There is nary a chapter where someone isn’t getting naked or having sex. Granted, his attention is not completely unwarranted. He’s a genuine nice guy who talks and tries to relate to the people around him. Dare I say his only real faults are his inability to make quick decisions and set his own boundaries…which get crossed a lot.

There is plot to this; and it’s kind of difficult to describe. Emiru and Kido’s relationship is bizarre to put it into one word; fucked up if you put it in two. Their relationship seems co-dependant (and antagonistic) to the point where they protect their secret arrangement and each other on more than one occasion. The most memorable scenario is probably the chapter where an acquaintance finds out about the hole and tries to coerce Emiru into a similar relationship. Kido shows up just in time in a police uniform to scare off the perp.

It’s a summer uniform in the winter time but the perp doesn’t realize this.

The manga manages to stay on the lighthearted if not dramedic (drama/comedy) tone until you get to Emiru’s backstory. Then everything goes promptly to shit and things get progressively messy. Everything comes to a head when the two realize that too many secrets can ruin friendships. Neither Kido nor Emiru are innocent characters and are deeply flawed and the manga makes sure to show that. 

Unlike most manga of this nature, Kido isn’t exactly your typical Generic Hentai Protagonist. While he seems to be at the very least, plain, he thinks about and considers the consequences of his actions and tries to do right by people. He doesn’t “actively” seek out scenarios but instead becomes trapped in situations because he’s a pushover and has trouble setting his own boundaries. He is able to abide by Emiru’s rules for the peeping, but he doesn’t put up personal boundaries (aside from the “not cheating on my girlfriend” rule). Because of this he ends up crossing over into more and more risque situations that cause more and more trouble down the line.

And shit like this happens.

Emiru is a strange character in and of herself. A lot of times you don’t find women in comics who have voyeuristic fantasies, much less develop mutual relationships with other people who enjoy it too. While her motivations are screwed up and complex, they can be appreciated for what they are. Throughout the story Emiru is the only character who remains “honest”. She doesn’t cheat on anyone, encourage cheating, or seek to ruin relationships…yet all the drama revolves around her and her proximity to Kido. All of it. 

To post any more about the story would be spoiling the whole thing. It’s a must read for perverts and perverts who claim that they read it for the plot. 


Personal Thoughts?

Well…it is an ecchi/seinen manga so I like it based off of the premise alone. I’ll even include links to my Top 5 Favorite scenes (Zero context because you’ll have to read it yourself):

I appreciate this manga for showing us the (possible) real life consequences of voyeurism. Some characters lose relationships because of their prying eyes. Other people find love and work through their feelings. Some realize they lack a sense of self due to their obsessions. It should also be noted that everyone engages in consensual and non-consensual peeping but that doesn’t make it right! 

This manga also manages to hit you in the feels on more than one occasion. It’s always surprising to catch feelings while reading what is essentially porn with plot. I think that’s what makes this such a fun read that I keep getting back to. 

 There’s also the surprising trait of showing men and women in an equal light as well. Everyone’s actions are shown as being serious and assault is NOT played for laughs. While everything ends kind of tidy there is a TON of gut wrenching content between chapters. This manga also kind of gives me I”s vibes and I don’t know why…

Another story for another day…

I have to hammer home a quick point that I made earlier: YOU ABSOLUTELY CAN GET CRIMINAL CHARGES FOR VOYEURISM AND EXHIBITIONISM. This stuff will stay on your criminal record and will cost you your jobs and livelihoods. If you want to peep, make sure the other person/group of people knows. Don’t film people without their consent. 

They absolutely WILL call the cops on you.


*Tomie: One of my favorite horror manga. More on that some other time.


Surviving Anime Conventions Part 3

I was honestly going to write about cosplay meltdowns today but I decided not to. Cosplay is fun, but not necessary to enjoy a good weekend. I also don’t have enough experience with making my own cosplays to start giving out actual advice.

<insert image with caption “I gotta get my street cred up>

Instead we will discuss more room etiquette and how to NOT catch Con-Plague because that’s what I’m good at!

Room Etiquette

In an earlier post I talked about what to do when rooming at a convention, today I am adding to that. You know all about broke friends and sleeping arrangements. Now get ready for:

  • WASH YOUR ASS! This should go without saying. There’s no reason why you can’t shower in a hotel room that offers you soap and water for bathing. You have everything you need right at your disposal; this is a ball I can’t believe some of you drop every fucking year.

This tweet haunts me to this day.

You don’t have any excuses. Not staying clean spreads germs and starts pandemics. I have this theory that a zombie apocalypse will start at an anime convention because some jackass didn’t wash their hands. Don’t be that jackass.

  • Stay organized! Don’t leave your shit laying about. Repack your suitcase, bring hangers to use that closet space! Put your clothes in the drawers where the tv stand is! Don’t trip! You’re an adult!
  • Get some sleep! Your body doesn’t work the way it used to. You will surely die if you don’t sleep! I usually recommend 6 hours MINIMUM for full grown adults. I personally clock in around 8 because I can’t function after around 23:30 or so.
  • Stay hydrated! Drink plenty of water and throw a mini Gatorade somewhere in there. You’ll function at full power if you hydrate properly.
  • Bring cleaning supplies! Those glasses in your hotel room aren’t as clean as you think! Bring some dish soap to clean your dishes at the hotel room. Housekeeping does their best to come to every room but even they miss details. I personally bring:

-dish soap


-Febreeze (to freshen up the sheets)

-paper towels

  • Agree on a room temperature! I haven’t run into this too much since I usually have enough blankets for whatever the room temp is supposed to be. If some people get colder more easily, make sure the room is a comfortable temperature. Usually I go 5-10 degrees colder than the hottest temp outside for summer weather.
  • Store your props carefully! This also goes without saying. You want to avoid breaking precious cargo? Don’t leave it out if you can help it!

Plan Your Con Days!

Usually a con schedule is released a few weeks in advance to attendees. This should give you enough enough time to decide what panels you want to show up for. Most of these can be split into a few sections:

  • Workshops (cosplay how-to’s, writing, networking, programming)
  • Viewings (watching anime episodes, movies, line dubbing)
  • Concerts/Contests (sometimes involves standing and jumping
  • Game Rooms (usually sitting, but depending on what kind of games you play; your activity level will be different)
  • With this information you can choose how to spend your day. Most people go Hard Mode™️ on Saturday Night where there’s the most activity and use Sunday for the recovery day.
  • On Saturday there’s usually the rave, cosplay contests (final round), and concerts. If you plan on staying up for these activities you’ll usually want to go easy during the day so you have energy to make it through the night. Wear your best (read: comfortable) shoes and get hydrated because you’ll need it.
  • Last Day Damages

  • At first I didn’t say this because I didn’t think I needed to; but after thinking about it I’ll say it: don’t damage con property! This includes your hotel room, elevators, hallways—ALL OF IT! Just Google “Katsucon Damages” and you’ll understand what I’m talking about. For backstory: Katsucon 2016 had HELLA damage. I’m leaving it at that. Click the link for yourself.
  • I’m not sure how it happens but people get a few days off of work and the temperature rises a few degrees and suddenly a bunch of ya’ll lose your gotdamn minds. I’m not sure what’s so fun about punching holes in doors or slapping the back of exit signs but our hotel prices keep going up and that’s going to be a problem really soon. Like…six months from now scratch that and make it 3. I’ve already seen ACen room prices ticking upward and security is getting tighter. GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER!
  • Check Your Ego at the Door

  • Ever since people started dressing up in costumes it seems like somebody had to ruin the fun for the rest of us. If you’ve been alive long enough you’ll come to notice that dressing up as your favorite character isn’t quite as fun as it used to be.
  • Why is that?
  • Short answer: egos.
  • Cosplay is often a place where people get to show off their craftsmanship and sewing skills. And why not? Nothing says you love a character like emulating them as much as possible! Normally this is fun! But somewhere along the way people got sidetracked by their own egos.
    • Have the same costume as someone else?
      Someone “not your aesthetic” wearing a costume you don’t think they should be wearing?
      Someone getting more attention than you?
      Cosplayer doesn’t want to shoot with you or be your significant other?

    Lo and behold the spirit of strife and suffering is upon you because you can’t mind your own business!

    Ya done fucked up luv.

    Nothing ruins a good time like some elitist acting like the Cosplay Police™️ saying shit nobody asked for. Nobody. Nobody wants to hear your opinion on their cosplay! Unless they’re in competition, you shouldn’t be giving out unsolicited opinions. You don’t like it? Move on. Close your eyes. Fuck off to nowhere.

    Don’t comment on people’s bodies. Don’t comment on their ability level. Don’t compare cosplayer’s to each other. Don’t comment on cosplayer’s skin color. Don’t comment on cosplayer’s weight.

    Read that bold statement above. Memorize it. Write it on index cards. I don’t care what you do, you’d better be able to say this shit in your sleep. Stop fucking with people. I don’t know when some of you became such dramaholics and general festering piles of garbage but it’s time to put an end to it. There will be a day one of you puss-oozing ass clowns will be forced to swallow your teeth because you messed with the wrong person.

    Leave people alone. Swallow that ego before it gets too big and you choke on it. At some point you will be force-fed your own words in the forms of: screen shots, video recordings and lawsuits. Good fucking luck lying your way out of a court hearing when your own Facebook posts, Instagram comments, and Tweets come back to haunt you. Keep your words soft and sweet everybody!

    By the time you hit 25 you’re too grown to be playing these telephone games and should already be an expert at minding your own business. If you can’t keep your (trash) opinions to yourself and enjoy the weekend like a normal person, do you really need to be at a con? If you constantly find yourself in drama you might want to rethink your life entirely. You can’t be around people without rumors starting up maybe you need to…go somewhere else?


    Life doesn’t end at 25 but criminy it can feel like it! You can still have fun at anime conventions even if you can’t do a steady diet of ramen and Jack Daniels. Part of it is knowing your limits and weaknesses and working around them.

    If you like my writing, please consider buying me a ko-fi sometime!

  • Dere To Believe Part 2: Yandere

    Here we go again with another segment on anime personalities and why they do not translate to real life. Today’s model personality (and an EXTREMELY popular one at that) is the yandere and what makes them so damn appealing. Grab your knives and turn off your cellphones because she’s likely tracked your location and she is on her way to your house.

    What is a Yandere?

    Yandere (ヤンデレ) is derived from the Japanese word yanderu (病んでる) which means “insane” or “sick” and deredere (デレデレ) which means affectionate. Put those two words together and you have someone who literally sick/insane with “love” for another person and laundry list of problems that are only beginning and will, in fact, get so much worse.

    The Yandere is (usually) a female character who is in love with someone who is often the main character. Since this is often a female trope I will use the pronouns she/her throughout this post. Her love is characterized by her willingness to do anything to prove her love to the object of her affection. And by anything we mean ANYTHING. Stalking, kidnapping, (attempted) murder are not stricken from the list. If she wants you, she will have you at ANY COST. She may or may not have a body count (dead or alive), several social media accounts, and maybe a burner phone along with diaries or a stalker shrine. And more often than not, she has a very cute appearance.

    On the surface, most Yanderes are fairly well put together, likable, and unassuming and usually friendly people…that is until they develop a love interest. In anime they take the forms of characters such as the notorious Yuno Gasai:

    That cellphone is magic.

    Possibly tied for first with Kotonoha Katsura:

    Something about a boat?

    And then there’s this bitch:

    Anna Nishikiyomiya- Shimoneta

    You have to watch the anime to get the full scope of why she’s terrifying. She’s played for laughs.

    Through my personal observations and some help from Captain Obvious I’ve noticed that in spite of the very terrible things these characters do (Yuno drugs and kidnaps Yuki, Kotonoha kills her rival and her love interest), they still have an even more dedicated fanbase. Even though these characters are in dire need of therapy and commitment to an institution, the predominantly male fanbase goes fucking nuts over them.

    Who is a Yandere?

    Technically anyone can be a yandere if they get desperate enough. Get rejected “one too many times”? Can’t get someone off your mind and refuse to deal with it in a healthy way? Got entitlement issues? You’re a Yandere in the making and you might want to seek help?

    Why is a Yandere?

    Why are they like this? In anime they’re usually given a tragic backstory that gains audience sympathy. You don’t agree with her actions but you’ve developed an understanding. Double those points if you can see yourself doing similar things if you were in their situation. Sometimes they’re used for comedic effect like Juvia from Fairy Tail.

    She gets a little better…

    Sometimes they’re the Token Evil Teammate who is only around to protect their love interest from anyone who is a rival—which is pretty much everyone who is NOT them. They are prone to wildly inappropriate behavior which includes (but is not limited to):

    • Stalking
    • Taking pictures of said person without their knowledge.
    • Kidnapping or paying someone to kidnap their love interest
    • Attempting to isolate their LI, usually done by spreading rumors or emotionally/financially abusing them
    • Sexually harassing/assaulting them
    • Stealing items that belong to said person
    • Continuing unwanted contact (creating multiple social media accounts to continue interactions)

    And this largely gets swept under the rug because they are attractive. Case and point:

    Article found here.

    I found this on the Facebook page Eccentric Weeaboo where the poster cleverly shares the events with the caption “Real Life Yandere You Say”?

    Screen Shot 2019-05-26 at 10.16.49 AM
    Also, fuck this person for calling her a girl. She’s 21.

    The story according to Tokyo Reporter is a woman stabbed the man twice and was prepared to kill herself when the police caught her. I will not link the aftermath photo to avoid the squeamish aspects. I will also not be linking the comments that state the various levels of admiration and the *ahem* things they’d like to have this woman do to them and vice versa. I will however share this post because it encompasses my collective confusion at some of ya’ll:

    Screen Shot 2019-05-26 at 10.47.54 AM

    How are Yanderes?

    The collection of “what the fuck-ness” that is my brain continues to baffle me while reading the comments on these posts. I’m not entirely sure why men are this way towards cute female characters that would in fact kill them to keep them. In the case of this woman, I would dare say that Japense fetishization plays HEAVILY in the roll of wishing to have a yandere gf, but that’s a post for another day and ya’ll ain’t ready for this.

    As long as the person in question is attractive, all sorts of behaviors can be excused due to pretty bias. It’s a psychological thing where you associate beauty with goodness and your cognitive dissonance erases anything resembling common sense because you’re stupid. That’s it. Stupidity. Your stupid horny ass is going to get you killed.

    While being a dumbass sucks, it’s kind of understandable. After all, a yandere’s obsession can often be seen as love to some people. And honestly, the appeal of someone being willing to do anything to protect you and keep your happiness in the forefront of their minds sounds like an ideal loving relationship–at first. Unhealthy relationship expectations, inexperience, and low self esteem are pitfalls that make people vulnerable to these kinds of people. And then there are people who actively pursue this sort of thing.


    I’m not here to tell you where to stick your dick, but I’m also suggesting that you don’t bed crazy or actively pursue it. The Yandere personality translated to real life is terrifying with tragic results. A quick Google search will turn up no shortage of articles on “spurned lovers” who “snapped” and killed the objects of their obsession and caused TONS of collateral damage as a result. I also understand that not everyone is like this. The comments sections of articles of beautiful women committing crimes is full of people who understand the despicableness of their actions and hold them accountable.

    When are Yanderes?

    When are Yanderes acceptable? By acceptable I mean “when are yandere’s seen as love-interests and when are they creepy?” There are two rules that are consistently followed:

    1. They have a backstory with enough audience sympathy to make their actions seem “not as bad” or justifiable/understandable based on their plight.
    2. They are attractive, almost to a fault. The ones I’ve seen in media are often quiet and unassuming, often nice or polite. They are pretty, nice to look at, and have nice voices.

    In real life this sometimes translates and sometimes doesn’t. Female stalking (a stock yandere behavior) is often seen as a sign of mental illness and is usually unacceptable. This is explored in the video “Stalking for Love” by Pop Culture Detective.

    There are several videos that explore this and similar concepts that get portrayed in media as positive when they actually shouldn’t and also happen to be textbook yandere behaviors:

    Yanderes in real life are obsessive, controlling, and abusive individuals. Making multiple social media accounts to “check up on” or stay in contact with people who do not want to be in contact with you is not healthy. Threatening to hurt yourself or others is also wrong. The best thing you can do for yourself when you’re rejected is to back off and move on with your life. Some therapy wouldn’t hurt either.

    Are YOU the Yandere?

    Maybe you’ve noticed while reading this that some of your behaviors fall along these lines. What do you do when you’ve been obsessively stalking someone? What do you do when you’re three accounts deep and people have receipts? You’ve recognized your behavior and you want to stop it.

    First of all, I’m not your psychologist or your therapist so I can’t actually give you the best advice you need to change and rectify your behaviors. I’m also not studying psychology or anything in that field so I’m not an expert on these things. The only thing I can do is point you in the right direction. So here are a few bits of food for thought:

    • Schedule an appointment with a doctor/psychologist/therapist as soon as possible. If you’re unable to schedule with a professional, the next best thing is to join a support group for people with obsessive behaviors.
    • Delete your extra social media accounts. You don’t need them.
    • Look for and practice healthy behaviors that will help your mental health.

    Seeking help is your first step to recovery and developing a health sense of self and relationships.

    If you liked reading this buy me a ko-fi sometime!